Hey Rick Ross, Michael Jordan does not consider you a friend.

I’m not even sure that Michael Jordan knows who Rick Ross is. I mean it’s possible that Mike caught some of that beef with Fitty, there was enough random YouTube content to penetrate Mike’s life, maybe. But either way, this has to be one of the most illogical and unnesccesary statements from a rapper regarding athletes in God knows how long. I mean seriously, “Mike, we don’t need to hear that from you”. Rick, you can’t see your toes homie, I’m pretty sure that both Lebron and MJ would be down to never hear you utter their names in an interview again.

And for the record, Michael Jordan’s comments about the Lebron James saga? SPOT THE FUCK ON.

Just Don’t Do It! Jordan’s are not worth it.

Before I’m judged by kicks fanatics alike, I want you to know a couple of facts about my past relationship with Nike.

1. I used to own and proudly rock a 10K gold Nike pendant on a 14K Figaro chain
2. I spent 180 dollars on a Nike tracksuit on a day designated as World “Boycott Nike” Day
3. I saw an ad once for 50$ if you got a NIKE tattoo and send it in to the evil bastards. (I considered it for months)

Satisfied? I’ve served my shoe gods with diligence, I’ve earned the opportunity to judge those who consider purchasing expensive kicks. First, let me say this, it’s a fucking RECESSION guys! It has amazed me throughout 2009 to witness a plethora of retail agents and establishments continue to put forth products sans a reduction in price. Not to mention the idiots who hit me up on the street daily for a charitable donation to their respective support group. ” Excuse me, could you spare a moment for pediatric research?” No homie, I’m on a 15 minute break and I need a coffee to make it. I mean, that’s the truth of the matter, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m living check to check right now. And towards the end of the month that really means day to day. So yeah, wake up chump, you’re broke just like me, so don’t DUMP money into your kicks right now, shit, take half a year off that crap.

Well, I had a myriad of other points to make about this. But I just read over my first one, and yeah, that really should suffice. But before I leave you with a video of what you could look like if you snag a pair of Jordan XI’s, I ask you to consider one possible alternative scenario. Go cop a pair of dope sneakers that you genuinely appreciate for 75 dollars. For example, I would seriously consider this pair of Jordan III’s for 65 bills at Crispy Kicks. After you cop your crispy clean kicks of choice, take the extra 100 bucks, or whatever it truly is without you borrowing or stealing, consider the following charity: Soles 4 Souls. Give them whatever you got, and experience guilt-free enjoyment when you examine your kicks throughout the holiday season. Call it utopian, but if you only donate a buck and cop a pair of reasonably priced sneakers, I guarantee you the world will be a better place because of it. That isn’t utopian, that’s practical. Just Do It.

Or be this guy.

2010 J’s

A pair of Jordan shoes are worth dying for. Well, perhaps not actually dying, though many have attempted to kill for a pair of them, directly and indirectly. The Jordan shoe is the zenith of athletic shoes for any given year, every subsequent basketball based shoe humbly stands aside and lets Jordan bask in the warmth of the constant spotlight. Today the 2010 Jordan launched, hence crime rates across urban America will skyrocket this weekend.

Are they really worth fighting for? Go buy some Starbury’s and get a Thai massage; you’ll feel much aligned, you’ll still have some kicks on, all for a quarter of the price of some MJ’s.

More looks of the ’10 Jordan after the jump

Chronicles of Lebron

Professional athletes are often the envy of all hard working men. The notion of getting paid to play a game you love is a difficult pill to swallow. Across the board there are sure to be a plethora of justifiable examples of the ‘pay to play’ phenomenon. Some of these individuals are talented stars in their leagues, but lack the will to excel, some are plainly not working hard in the gym and collecting a check. However, for the chosen few, the superstars, sport is more than a game, it’s a divine decree. The two stars that come to mind when considering life beyond the game are Lebron and Michael. Simply put, Jordan is the most dominant player to have ever played sports in a professional setting. Lebron James is the closest thing we have to replicating the legendary entity.

When you’ve reached the level of global significance that these men have, it becomes society’s responsibility to document their tale. For Jordan, it was pretty much happening every other year during his NBA career, from Airtime to Michael Jordan: To The Max, Mike was commemorated. Peep a YouTube video thread of the Michael Jordan: To The Max in its entirety after the jump.

Lebron has been on a PR tour showcasing the premiere’s pf his documentary entitled More Than A Game. The documentary illustrates the story of Lebron’s precocious and mercurial rise to fame.

Lebron, never one to slip up when representing the urban youth, ensured that a relevant group of artists were featured on the soundtrack that accompanied this documentary. As is the case, the score is a fundamental part to any good documentary. Unfortunately, I find the soundtrack abhorrently lackluster, but enough NBA fans will appreciate the tracks, basketball fans have a predictably unique taste in hip hop.

Peep the track listing after the jump.

Random Throwback: Jordan X Mobb Deep

Strange isn’t it? It was weird enough to see Jordan come back and rock that nasty Wizards jersey, but a Bullets throwback, that’s just too much. For starters Jordan use to tear up the Washington Bullets, just like every other prolific scorer did when being guarded by Mitch Richmond. Perhaps that’s why this jersey is being sold for a measly 30 bones (on Ebay, click the pic). It’s hard to justify spending money on a product that aesthetically conveys akward and not right. This uncomfortable consumption is much like the feeling I had when I saw Mobb Deep sign with G-Unit, even with the cohort of M.O.P and Mase. To me Mobb Deep exemplified the unapologetic swagger of  a NYC thug. G-Unit on the other hand is the NYC thug equivalent of Glam Rock, think Girl Talk with an AR-15. Soon after, Prodigy was locked up, and I thought that was the end of that. However, this video (below) appears to foreshadow the inevitable; just another legend trying to make a comeback.

MPFREE: DJ Enyce – Mobb Deep – Welcome to G-Unit (Mixtape)

Peep some old Mobb and the back of the Jordan jersey after the jump…

Guest Writer: G Plimp speaks on STD’s and worse yet, MJ!

MJ VOTED INTO HALL OF FAME ON FIRST BALLOT, BODES WELL FOR THOSE BETTING THE SUN WILL RISE TOMORROW

On Nov. 7th, 1991, Magic announced he had “attained” HIV.  If you had told me that 17 years later Magic would still be alive I wouldn’t have believed you.  If you had told me that 17 years later Magic would be happier, wealthier, and more pimpin’ than MJ I would have called you a fucking idiot.  Yet here I am in sunny Los Angeles, 2009, and Magic is all smiles all the time with an empire of Starbucks, gyms, movie theaters and worth $700 million.  Michael, on the other hand, seems truly unhappy.  A B-student in any community college psychology class could tell you that from watching one interview. 

 

MJ got punked by Abe Polin (the Washington Wizards owner who fired Mike from the front office after he quit playing the third time).  He’s divorced, works in North Carolina, makes questionable draft choices (Okay, so he didn’t exactly make a play for Greg Oden, but Adam Morrison?  Really?), and he’s pissed off about being the most inevitable first ballot Hall of Famer in the history of sport (Pele doesn’t count, he was actually officially made a “National Treasure” by the boys in Brazil).  Here he his, at guard, from North Carolina, in his own words (excerpted from the LA Times):

 “Look,” Jordan somberly said, “this is not fun for me. I don’t like being up here for the Hall of Fame, because at that time your career is completely over, is the way I look at it. I was hoping this day is 20 more years, or actually when I’m dead and gone. . . . Now, when you get in the Hall of Fame, what else is there for you to do?”

 “This is kind of a love-hate thing for me,” Jordan said ” . . . but for me, I’ll always want to be able to have you thinking that I can always go back and play the game of basketball. Put my shorts on. . . . Am I? No. But I’d like for you to think that way.”

 “Hall of Fame?” Jordan said. “To me it’s like, OK, it’s over and done with. It’s pretty much done — you can’t ever put a uniform back on. It’s totally the end of your basketball career.

 ”It’s a great accomplishment, I don’t walk away from it. But I’ve never envisioned myself really wanting to be up here so quickly. I wanted it to be when I was 70 years old, or something, 80 years old, but I’m [46] and I still think I can play.”

 LA Times – Michael Jordan can’t escape basketball Hall of Fame

MJ is my boyhood hero and I don’t want to kick the man while he’s “down”.  But this isn’t the first time something wasn’t quite right with Mike.  That’s obvious.  Even Slam’s Scoop Jackson would probably agree.  And his tongue is usually so far up Jordan’s ass it looks like his Airness is sitting on Gene Simmons’ face.  Leave aside conspiracy theories (MJ’s marriage was a cover/sham, James Jordan Sr. was wacked over his son’s unpaid gambling debts or the baseball retirement was a “secret suspension” from David Stern) and you’re still left with some weirdness.  Stephon Marbury’s arguably done more to combat sneaker street violence (Starbury).  Honestly, I’m glad Air Jordans stayed unaffordable and full of mystique, but the fact remains that one of the guys currently doing life in the hooskow (as Mars Blackman’s alter ego would put it) for killing Michael’s pops was actually rocking an Air Jordan T-shirt at the time of his arrest.   MJ’s kid charity (the Michael Jordan Foundation) was investigated and shut down over misappropriation of charitable funds. The Wizards comeback was welcome, but baseball?  Really?

 At least his Heels are on top and his girlfriend is hot, but come on, he’s Michael Jordan.  In the words of another degenerate gambler, anything less would be uncivilized.

 

 - G Plimp